What really makes a hero? Do you ever think about that?

Certainly, law enforcement, firefighters, doctors and all first responders come to mind. I think of people like Officer Ann Carrizales, the Stafford officer shot in the face and chest during a routine traffic stop in 2013. Never one to back down, she got back in her car, chased her suspects into Houston and apprehended one of three before seeking medical treatment. Today, she divides her time between protecting the community (“I was born to be a protector,” , “I would gladly lay down my life to protect any of you”) and using her personal story of danger, the fight and triumph to give strength and inspiration to millions around the globe through her travel and public speaking.

What would our society be without these true gems?  Joining their ranks, though, are many everyday people and children who I believe are also heroes.

There are parents who have lost children to cancer, children who might have been graduating preschool or high school this week . . . these parents, some of whom I know well, have taken this unimaginable loss and continued to live lives of peace, fruitfulness and purpose. To me, they are heroes.

There are children who stood up to bullies, decided not to follow the crowd and withstood mountains of pressure at school this past year. To me, they are heroes.

There are people enlisting in the military, choosing to leave the comforts of home and do missionary work, serve the poor, rescue animals, and stand up to social injustices whatever it might cost. To me, they are heroes.

There are many heroes amongst us. This week, Crime Stoppers honored three of them at our Houston’s Heroes Awards Luncheon: Michelle Heinz, Laura Ward and Lt. Wendee Wakeman. These women are very different yet share a passion and dedication towards their cause that goes above and beyond the normal. They have each, in their own way, thrown themselves into the trenches and conquered things many of us cannot even imagine.

After realizing that there were legal loopholes that essentially protect those who prey upon children, Michelle Heinz rolled up her sleeves, went to Austin and testified before the Senate and House to legally close those loopholes. And she succeeded. Michelle isn’t an attorney or a policy maker. She is an incredible person, a mother of three and adored in her community. Strapped with nothing more than impeccable research and a determination to see this change, Michelle’s work will protect children for generations.

Similarly, Laura Ward, the wife of Dave Ward, could spend every day being a “lady who lunches” but that wouldn’t sit well with her. Instead, she wakes up every day and works with her board at Houston’s Children’s Charity to give every child in this city a bed to sleep on, clothes to wear and toys for the holidays. She doesn’t have to do it but through her work, she is overseeing life altering gifts to families truly in need, families who will be forever changed by her presence.

And finally, Lt. Wende Wakeman took the hard road and worked the ranks through the Department of Public Safety, to the Texas Highway Patrol to DPS Narcotics. Being stationed on the Texas/Mexico border where the risk was most dangerous didn’t phase this incredible woman. Can you imagine what her days and nights were like there? What she saw? The arrests she made? And she did it all for you, me and hundreds of thousands of other people she will never meet. Noticed for her willingness to give everything she had, Lt. Wakeman became the first female ever to be promoted to a Texas Ranger Lieutenant.

There are people every day who defy the odds, do their best and give of themselves. They make this world a better place and I am so thankful for them.

Who are the heroes in your life? Who has inspired you?

I was simply organizing my kids’ backpacks when a bright blue sheet of paper fell right onto my lap. The title hit me like a ton of bricks; it simply read: TK graduation! RSVP Now! My stomach instantly sank. This notice meant my youngest child was graduating transitional kindergarten. Time was moving quickly and, let’s face it, we were all getting older. This thought made me want to cry.

Within a few seconds, I moved on to my next thought: as wonderful as graduations are, they mean something else is to follow: summer. Oh, the joys of summer. For kids, that first summer morning represents the dawn of a new day. For parents, it represents the sheer torture of finding fun, age-appropriate activities that hopefully don’t require using Excel spreadsheets, Google Maps and 15 different supporting documents just to figure out where the troops are at all times and how they will be getting from points A to B.

No matter how you look at it, or how old your children are, with the upcoming change in schedule can come some potential public safety concerns. Here are 5 issues that I hope all parents will make sure they are aware of for this summer:

1. “100 deadliest days for teens.” The spring season represents a time for older students to have parties, formals/proms, and other school-related events. It’s wonderful but here’s a shocking truth: The months of April, May and June represent the deadliest three months of the year for teens. Additionally, AAA calls the period between Memorial Day and Labor Day “The 100 Deadliest Days” for teen drivers. What’s the cause? Fatal car accidents. As kids get excited for the end of year festivities, please remind them to drive safely, stick to driving in daylight hours, never have more than one or two friends in a car, never use a phone while driving, and never drink while driving.
2. Be careful of your teen sending or receiving inappropriate photos. As the school year starts to wind down, many students relax and focus on the freedoms ahead. Kids get a little more excited and a little less cautious. Sexting and inappropriate cell phone use spikes as a result.  It’s never a bad idea to talk to your teens about the risks and realities of sending and receiving inappropriate text messages. Remind them that whether they take the photo and/or forward a photo and/or just receive a photo – regardless of their intentions, if they are simply in possession of inappropriate photos of minors, they can be found guilty of creating or distributing child pornography. If caught, they will face a legal battle and potentially have to register as sex offenders. Beyond anything else, they run the risk of dealing with the emotional scars of this activity for decades to come.
3. Beware of online friends. Like most kids, summer months mean freedom to use social media and/or gaming devices for as long as is allowed by the parents in the home. (Isn’t it sad that gone are the days of endless bike riding and exploring around the neighborhood?) This is a perfect time to start discussing what is expected and what will be allowed when school is out. Remind kids what the risks are when engaging strangers online. Furthermore, let’s speak frankly about the fact that a trained predator can find out where the home is of an untrained youngster who is simply chatting with friends and/or posting even innocent photos. And above all else, PLEASE, make sure kids promise to never speak to a stranger and never (ever) meet a stranger face-to-face. It doesn’t matter if they have been chatting for weeks, months or years. It doesn’t matter if they have become best friends. It doesn’t matter if they have already shared pictures. It doesn’t matter if their best friends will be going with them. If you are not there and this doesn’t involve you, a meeting should never happen.
4. When outdoor funs turns into outdoor disasters. Thinking ahead, many parents will start to order trampolines or outdoor water activities for the kids. Please be careful! The American Academy of Pediatrics estimates close to 100,000 kids ages 5 to 14 are injured each year on trampolines. Additionally, for children under age 5, drowning is a leading cause of accidental death with death rates of nearly 3 per 100,000 in 2010. Pools are the #1 location where these drownings occur. Know the facts, think twice before you go out and order that trampoline or have your kids run around homes or neighborhood parks where there are pools.
5. Get the grade, but get it honestly. As the school year comes to a close and exam season kicks in, kids undoubtedly feel the pressure to do a good job and finish the year successfully. This means some will spend a lot of time studying. Others will resort to cheating. One study found that as many as 85 percent of students engage in some type of academic dishonesty before graduating from high school. More importantly, younger kids are feeling the pressure to cheat in response to increased academic pressures at school. Remind your child of the disciplinary actions possible in their schools but also that as long as they are doing their best, working hard do well are starting to cheat more.

“There are three things I want to be when I grow up, Mommy.”

“What’s that?” I asked my first grader.

“Well, I can’t decide. I’ll either be a teacher, an astronaut or a police woman.” She paused. “I’m not sure which I’ll be. How will I know?”

Thankfully, she looked away and focused back on her craft. But as she did so, I couldn’t help but stare. Her little fingers, so small, were working away. Her biggest issue at this very moment was finishing that craft. That was the biggest thing on her plate. For me, I just continued to stare. What would she be? I wondered… Who will she be? And how will I get her to where she needs to go? The gravity of it all sunk in, ever so slightly, in that precious moment.

Of course, I turned a simple conversation into the challenge of a lifetime. I am after all, a mother. And on this day, Mother’s Day, I think of all of the other moms out there who also turn little moments into complexities that can’t quite be tackled in a simple moment.

I’m not sure about you, but this day means so much to me…. It has nothing to do with presents or praise. It has everything to do with the simple fact that I live each day recognizing the role of a mother. I think of my own mother (a dynamic, loud, very strong, short Mediterranean women who raised my sister and I to be the best we possibly could be – love you Mom!) and appreciate a time when the community stops to do the same.

What will she be one day? I don’t know and it’s certainly too early to tell but I do know that this very day, and each one before and each one after, will shape her foundation and play an integral role in her future.

There are many types of mothers, aren’t there? Mothers who “hover,” mothers who let go, mothers who work, are single or stay home. There are moms who identify in nothing other than their children; there are moms who have to carry their own loads and can’t fully focus on anything else. Whatever the type of mom, mothers play a huge role in their children’s life.

And isn’t it true that while we are all different, we share many similarities too. We’re all doctors (who nurse them in the midnight hours when they were sick), lawyers (who advocate for them when they can’t do it alone), coaches (who cheer them on and let them fall when it’s appropriate), drivers, party planners, chefs, teachers, confidants, first responders and more and more and more.

Whatever your family makeup, whatever type of parent you are, I take this day to applaud you. If you’re doing your best, giving your all, finding your own way, I applaud you.

We hopefully all know that those tiny hands, the ones that hold ours today and let go of them tomorrow, will one day realize why the community comes together to celebrate this day. They’ll one day have their own children and sit and wonder how they’ll raise them. And so the circle will continue.

Until then, we remain the springs from which they’ve sprung and while we each do it our own way, I must say, Happy Mother’s Day!

Voxer? Yik Yak? Kik?

If you’re in a normal home, your teen (or tween, YIKES!) knows more about social media than you do. You know it. They know it. And that’s dangerous.

But here’s the deal. Social media can be a wonderful tool for kids to connect with others. It is also the “tool of choice” for child predators and human traffickers. So what do we do? For the longest time, the advice was simply to “friend your kids on Facebook” so you can monitor them and hopefully get them to “act appropriately.” That worked for about five seconds.

While Facebook still remains the top social media site among U.S. teens, it’s now just a mere placeholder. Our kids are using other social media platforms to really engage with others, sites mom and dad are not on.

With that in mind, parents, sit down, grab a pen and let’s learn what we can. Here’s a run-down of 6 popular social media apps that our kids are using and everything you need to know about them.

1. Voxer. This app allows you to talk, send live or recorded text messages and photos instantly. These photos can go to one person or an entire group of people with a simple click. Voxer operates on any network, anywhere in the world and on any cellular or wifi network. It’s easy to use and easy to use privately. Additionally, you can be talking to people across the globe or sending photos without anyone ever noticing a thing on a data plan or cell phone bill. Parents, beware.
2. Yik Yak. Not only is the name horrible but so are the intentions behind this app. The creators call this all the “anonymous social wall for everything and anything.” How great for our vulnerable children! Here’s the problem, users are anonymous in that when you register, you don’t need to put any personal information (other than your location). Posts are called “Yaks” and show up in a live feed for others. The problem is these posts show up in “Yakers” who are in the same area…. While the app is rated for people 17+ and targets college students, younger users are loving the secrecy and usability of the app. Many find Yik Yak as a great tool for bullying and humiliating others. This social media tool was also the app of choice used by users in 40 incidents in which the student promises a mass murder attack against their school campus. Yik Yak, in a nutshell, offers nothing positive for its users and is an entry into trouble.
3. Ask.fm. Popular in Europe, this app is spreading like wildfire in the US. It’s rated 13+ and offers its users the chance to interact in a question-and-answer format with friends, peers and anonymous users all over the globe. The problem with Ask.fm is that it’s not a monitored side and loosely regulated. That makes for a great cyberbullying platform – and that’s just what Ask.fm has become known for. With 65 million users, it can become an overwhelming space for young kids not mature enough to engage in anonymous conversation. It proved to be too much for one 12-year old girl in Florida who took her life thanks to the relentless bullying she endured by other Ask.fm users (the death of 12-year-old Rebecca Sedwick of Florida).
4. Kik. If you ask kids anywhere, they know of and probably are already using Kik. You know who else is? Every single child predator across the globe. Kik is, by far, the worst app and most dangerous for our children. Profile photos attach with every correspondence making users feel like they are engaging in “face-to-face feel” conversations rather than regular texting. While “kiking it” you can quickly text photos, sketches or even send pre-designed greeting cards to individuals or groups. While rated ages 17+, there is no age verification requirement anywhere so kids of all ages, and many (MANY) tweens, call Kik an app of choice. Why do predators like it so much? Because it allows your child, at any age, to directly connect via instant message using just a username (meaning you don’t need to know someone well enough to have their phone number to start reaching out). If you see username “Sally2005” and want to reach out to Sally, who is probably 11 years old, you simply need to click on her username and start talking. Even reviews in the App Store or Google Play offer disclaimers on Kik, calling it a place where strangers meet for sexting. In addition to being housed overseas, there is almost no regulation over the Kik app; once a photo is shared, it is in the hand of who knows and parents have no means to take action. And finally, in addition to be on many parents’ lists of the “worst” app Kik also introduces children to sexually explicit drawings and images as well as games and conversations. If there is only one app to remove from your child’s phone, it’s Kik. Please remove it today!
5. Vine. A Twitter mobile app, Vine allows users to shoot and share short (6 seconds or less) loops of video. It’s rated 17+, but again, tweens and young teens across the states use it as a regular tool to share photos. The biggest problem with Vine? It’s become the place to send sexually inappropriate content. Actually, Common Sense Media’s review of the app says: “With the most basic creative searching, kids can find nudity, sex, drug use, offensive language, hardcore sexuality, and more” Common Sense Media says (link is external) in its review of the app. “While there are plenty of cute, fun videos, even adults might be shocked at some of the things they find.” Some parents feel that they’re okay with their kids using Vine as long as the videos they post are appropriate. My problem is that those who flock to Vine are often looking for suggestive content and will try to prey it out of even those who had no intention of using the app for that purpose. Why even put our kids in that situation? Note, parent often confuse Vine with Snapchat. Snapchat allows users to send photos and videos that disappear from view within 10 seconds of being received. Rated ages 12+, kids send racy photos thinking that their “self-destruction” keeps them safe. What kids need to realize is that all these images live forever on Snapchat’s server, can always be leaked and always be screenshot by the person on the receiving end.
6. And it gets worse. Justin Bieber has invested in this 12+ “selfie-only” photo-sharing app that will be heavily targeting your kids and mine. “Shots of Me.” This app does not allow for public comments but rather has a direct-messaging feature where users can send private messages to each other. Beware, the app shows the user’s location and how long ago the photo was taken unless you deliberately disable those features from the app’s settings. Problem here is that it’s one of many “selfie-driven” apps that is launching and finding creative ways to entice kids to take photos of themselves and share them with whoever is willing to engage.

If you’ve looked at your child’s phone and found any of these apps, I’d challenge you to sit down and find out which ones they like, use and in what manner they use it. Even if the answers are innocent, for their safety – and certainly this is a decision you make based on their age and maturity – I’d still choose to delete the apps. But, of course, remember, kids are desperate to engage online. A 2013 Pew Research Center survey showed that almost half of all teens online will lie about their age to gain access to social media sites. You can’t monitor every site or your child’s every move but you can reach them through constant communication, being brutally honest about the dangers and why their safety is your top concern.

Don’t take this topic lightly. Please. We have read far too many stories, spoken to far too many kids whose lives have forever been changed because they were not equipped to handle the pressures, tricks and traps of the online world. Don’t let your child be one of them.

The images were horrific. Families losing everything. Houses and cars destroyed. Lives being forever changed. And I couldn’t help but think that with the rise of human tragedy often comes the rise of criminal opportunity.

What makes scams related to home repair particularly attractive to criminals is the reality that in Texas, residential contractors do not have to get a license. This fact leaves the door open for many to claim this title.

In the wake of a storm, many of us are physically spent and emotionally drained. We want things back to normal as soon as possible. Scammers know you feel this way and show up at your door preying on those exact emotions. Here’s what you need to know:

• Be wary of door-to-door workers who mysteriously have a supply of materials (where are they from?) or who promise a quick turn-around at a questionably low price.
• Don’t contract with or even allow inspections by those who come to the house uninvited. Common scenario: A roofer shows up and says they can start work immediately (due to the gravity of the situation, of course), asks for full or partial payment but never comes back. Beware – these people target elderly. They will also usually say they were sent to you by your insurance company. This is false.
• Do your due diligence and engage in an educated search for a contractor. Talk to two or three companies, make sure they have an office, website or other business identifiers. Ask for references that are recent.
• Be leery of grandiose announcements of danger – your roof looks like it will cave in at any moment; it needs to be repaired today.
• Never pay for service before it’s done. Reputable contractors only ask for 10 or 20 percent of contract price. Go with the contractor to buy materials and arrange to have them delivered to your home. Never pay in cash.
• According to the Better Business Bureau: Require a written contract agreement with anyone you hire. Be sure their name, address, license number, if applicable, and phone number are included in the contract. Read and understand the contract in its entirety, and don’t sign a blank contract. A copy of the signed contract is to be given to you at time of signature. Make sure contracts are thorough and discuss supplies to be used, scope of work to be done, payment procedures, approximate length of the job, and liability and responsibility.
• Check the BBB’s scam tracker for more information to stay safe and, of course, check with your insurance company about policy changes or caveats that are pertinent to home repair due to a storm.

While it’s the last thing any of us should have to think of following a natural disaster, it is a reality we must understand and face. We know that scammers are out there and looking for easy targets. Don’t allow yourself to be one of them.

Our hearts and prayers go out to all of those affected by the recent flooding.