Thousands of young people are targets of bullying and cyberbullying every day, putting many at risk for outcomes such as depression or school absenteeism. Working with kids to create ways to address these issues is an important responsibility for adults. For example, adults can help those who are targets of bullying explore ways to respond assertively, and they can help those who carry out hurtful behaviors get support for addressing what’s underneath their actions. Adults can also assist young people in identifying strategies to use as bystanders who witness these behaviors.

Often when we think about the role of bystanders, we picture face-to-face bullying situations – and working with young people to explore skills for addressing these in-person situations is an important part of bullying prevention efforts. Considering the amount of time young people spend online – as well as the reported rates of cyberbullying – it’s also important for kids and adults to identify actions that can be used by those who witness online forms of bullying. Look for opportunities for young people to explore these issues and the kinds of strategies they can use to address cyberbullying by having conversations that pose the following kinds of questions.

What kinds of positive and negative behaviors have you noticed online?

In a study conducted by the Pew Research Center, 88 percent of teens who use social media said they had witnessed someone being mean or cruel to another person on a social network site. Sixty-nine percent also indicated they think their peers are “mostly kind” to each other on these sites. Ask young people about examples of both positive behaviors and cyberbullying behaviors they’ve witnessed within social media sites, chat rooms, online games or text messages. Examples of cyberbullying might include posting private and embarrassing information about someone, spreading a rumor or making hurtful comments about someone and inviting other people to join in.

How do you think cyberbullying affects people?

Witnessing an in-person bullying situation can provide powerful clues about the impact on the person being targeted. It may be harder to recognize the effects of aggression that takes place online. Ask young people their thoughts about what it feels like to be targeted by hurtful online messages. How might someone feel when threats against them or rumors about them are posted online and potentially “liked” by lots of people? These kinds of experiences can result in feelings of anger, loneliness, embarrassment, fear, hopelessness or depression. The experiences may even result in kids deciding to stay away from school and other places so they can avoid those who posted (or saw) the hurtful information.

Why do some people who witness cyberbullying choose to stay silent or ignore the situation?

Whether people witness hurtful behaviors online or in person, there can be many reasons why they choose to stay silent. They might feel speaking up could also put them at risk or that it could make the situation worse for the person being targeted. They might lack confidence about ways to take action or use their voice. Ask young people to share examples of times when they wanted to respond, but didn’t and why that was the case. Help them recognize that many adults also struggle with decisions about how to interrupt hurtful situations. Be willing to be vulnerable and share examples from your own experiences if that’s been the case for you.

What strategies have you used or could you use to interrupt or limit cyberbullying?

There are many actions available to people who witness cyberbullying or other hurtful online behaviors – actions that allow us to model important qualities like connection, compassion, empathy and courage.

Young people might share examples like the following:

• Intentionally decide not to “like” information that’s been posted about someone or not to forward a hurtful text to others. Stress that choosing to not support or further distribute hurtful messages is helpful because it may limit the potential damage of these messages.
• Respond publicly in a calm, clear and constructive way. Reacting from a place of anger and aggression can make a bad situation worse. Encourage kids (and adults!) to step away from the phone or computer so they don’t resort to blaming, shaming or retaliation. This provides time to get calm and centered so they can create a response that makes it clear that others’ behaviors are hurtful and unacceptable.
• Respond privately to the person who created the hurtful message. Depending on their relationship with the person who created or shared the hurtful message, it may be helpful for kids to follow up with them privately, either online, in a phone call or in person. Doing so can make it clear they don’t support the negative actions. It also provides an opportunity to authentically share concerns about the behavior and what might be behind it.
• Follow up with the person who was targeted. By reaching out, young people can send a powerful message that they care about the person and they don’t support the negative behaviors. If needed, this connection can also provide an opportunity to assist the person in finding help related to the situation.

Keep in mind that having conversations with young people about these issues is not a one-time event – it’s an ongoing dialogue. Begin talking about these issues before kids delve into the world of texting, social media, online gaming and chat rooms. Help them reflect on real and potential cyberbullying situations and provide ongoing opportunities to practice ways to respond. Doing so can support the transition from being passive bystanders to being allies who serve as powerful role models for other young people and adults.

Everyone seems to be running this week. Running to tie up loose ends at work. Running to kids’ performances. Running to order a turkey or decorations. Running to get ready to head out of town. Either way, we are running. And while it can be exhausting and stressful, it’s all of our blessings in life that cause all of that running around, and I’m thankful for all of it.

But my heart thinks of those who can’t “run” this week. My heart thinks of those who may have no place to run to or no family to get ready to see. My heart thinks of those who have recently seen tragedy or for those who are working this week just like any other week – doctors who are still on call, pilots who are still flying planes, officers who are still putting their lives on the line, waitresses who still have to take the night shift and so much more.

This is a short but sweet note for all of us to take a moment to stop and breathe and be thankful for our lives and all that is in it. And while this time is exhausting and comes with frustrations, may I offer a small dose of advice that I will use personally:

• Instead of arguing about politics, be thankful for a country that gives us each an equal opportunity to share our voice.
• Instead of arguing about household chores your spouse may or may not have done, be thankful that you have a spouse or partner who is safe and near you during the holidays.
• Instead of arguing with your family about thousands of potential topics, be thankful to have another year with each of them around your table or with you around theirs.
• Instead of feeling frustrated when you travel, be thankful you can get away.
• Instead of worrying about whether you and your kids look just right, take a moment to turn the holiday into thinking of others.
• Be conscious and purposeful in your love for others.
• Be conscious and purposeful in your desire to live fully and safely.
• Be conscious and purposeful in the time you give to others.
• And smile.

May you and your family enjoy every moment of this holiday week in peace, safety and happiness. I’m thankful for each of you.

Domestic violence affects 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men within their lifetime. Understanding this strain to our communities, Verizon has been dedicated to ending the cycle of domestic abuse through the HopeLine from Verizon program since 2001.

HopeLine collects mobile phones, batteries, chargers and accessories that are no longer used and turns them into resources that benefit domestic violence victims nationwide. Those resources include financial grants to local agencies such as shelters that provide support services to victims and to organizations like Crime Stoppers of Houston that uses public forums to create dialogue about the issue. HopeLine also partners with local agencies to provide victims with mobile phones and service, which is often their only means of contacting their loved ones.

Since 2001, the HopeLine program has collected over 12 million phones. In 2015, over 700,000 phones were collected and more than 7 million dollars was distributed in financial grants to local organizations nationwide.

There are two ways to get involved with HopeLine – drop off no-longer-used mobile devices to any Verizon Wireless store or plan a HopeLine drive to accompany your individual, company or community event. Information about hosting drives can be found online, Verizon.com/about/responsibility/domestic-violence-prevention.

One of the most important actions you can take is to encourage anyone you know who is affected by domestic violence to seek help. Contacting the National Domestic Violence Hotline (800) 799-SAFE or #HOPE from a Verizon Wireless phone can help a victim become a survivor.

I’m sitting here writing at almost midnight. The images on TV seem to be playing in a loop. I find myself simply wondering what is going on in our world? For instance:

There were bomb attacks in New York and New Jersey.

There was a “mass” stabbing in a mall in Minnesota.

An officer in Tulsa faces manslaughter charges for killing.

Charlotte is in a complete state of emergency.

These are just a few stories that have made headlines in the past week. It gives me pause. It makes me think, what now? What do we do now that we seem more fractured, more at risk and more vulnerable than ever before?

Helen Perry, a dear personal friend and friend to Crime Stoppers, recently spoke on life and living after tragedy. Last Tuesday, she joined us and about 250 others for a Breakfast with Crime Stoppers. She bravely, heroically and beautifully shared details surrounding her sister’s death in 1993.

Everybody knew and loved and had a connection to Marilyn Sage Meagher but her light was taken as two gained entry into her home and killed her in an attempt to steal her vehicle. Marilyn had just come back from the semi-annual sale at Tootsies. She was more than likely having a wonderful day. According to Helen, her last words were “Please don’t kill me, I have two kids.” Marilyn’s beloved daughter found her lifeless and beaten body in her home.

Life can seem so sad sometimes but as Helen shared the story, the entire room was left with a deep feeling of peace, of joy, of meaning. It made me think of a quote I recently read and loved:

When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life you have a thousand reasons to smile.

I thought of it again after hearing Helen speak so beautifully. And it made me think of each of you. So many of us are dealing with difficult issues. You have challenges at work, with your relationships or with your kids. Some of you have recently lost a beloved pet or other family member. There are health issues, hardships in the economy, rising crime rates or dreams that are not being realized. While everyone’s list will vary, encouragement is critical just the same. Encouragement. We all need it from time to time.

Here’s just one inspirational, encouraging quote from Helen’s speech:

“Some of you may be in the midst of a really tough season in your life . . . We either let God transform pain into peace and joy and surrender or we will surely transmit it. Transform it or transmit it.”

While we recognize the true reality of the “downs,” are you ready to join Helen and focus on a “thousand reasons to smile?” Are you ready to be stubborn about your quest for happiness (note, not a quest for perfection but a quest for happiness – there is a great difference!)? If so, for the sake of Helen Perry, for her sister Marilyn Sage Meagher and for all the strife we see in the world right now, take my challenge (and challenge your friends and families to do the same).

Share this post and, when you do, add your top 10 reasons to smile. Or, add your top 10 reasons in the comment section below.

Here are mine:

Good health
Strong family
Important work
Foundational faith
Friends who have become family
The ability to travel
Great food
Low humidity that leads to non-frizzy hair
Sunny mornings
Great coffee

We are so lucky to be on this journey of life. Every now and then, the twists and turns knock us down but getting back up is what makes the ride so incredible. In case you can’t hear the choir cheering you on, this post is for you. I’m cheering you on. And wishing you find strength in your own personal thousand reasons to smile.

Two avenues are available to the state, county or municipal authority which seeks to protect animals from abuse. Namely, criminal prosecutions under Chapter 42.09 of the Texas Penal Code or filing a civil action against the abuser under Texas Health & Safety Code Section 821.023.[i]

In the criminal proceeding, a defendant may face loss of freedom or fine or both, whereas under section 821.023 the abuser may be subject to financial loss and confiscation of the animal(s). Usually the civil remedy means that the owner or caretaker of the abused animal(s) will be required to pay the costs incurred by the relevant animal shelter for veterinary care as well as feeding and boarding of the animal(s) during the pendency of the lawsuit.

“Custody” Under Texas Law

Very often abusers (especially hoarders whose main form of abuse is neglect) will offer the defense of non or incomplete ownership of the animal(s). In both criminal and civil cases it is not difficult for the government to establish ownership. “Custody” is the operative word—proof of mere possession and control will satisfy the custody requirement especially in civil cases. In McDonald v. State of Texas,[ii] a defendant said that he found a dog in the back of his truck. His defense failed and he was convicted of abandoning the animal. The appeals court held that the manner of the defendant getting custody is irrelevant. Consequently, some appellate courts think that the McDonald court went too far in criminal cases, but the definition of “custody” will likely remain broad for civil cases.

Developments/Progress

Public awareness of animal cruelty and concern for animal welfare is growing and lawmakers and law enforcement are answering the concerns. Television programs such as “Animal Cops Houston” and “CNN Heroes” have fueled these changes. In 2009, Harris County District Attorney Patricia Lykos created a new Animal Cruelty Section. Her office also supported a successful cockfighting bill.[iii]

The Harris County DA’s office continues to be proactive with the HOPE Program (Helping Our Pets Through Education), which is essentially a youth education program aimed at preventing young people from becoming abusers. The program features an intensive webinar via the National District Attorney’s Association website, www.ndaa.org.[iv]

Harris County Attorney Vince Ryan is also concerned about animal welfare. He has continued and expanded the commitment to enforcement of the civil remedies provided by section 821.021 and 821.023 of the Texas Health & Safety Code. Sadly, nearly every week the County Attorney’s office obtains 4 to 10 judgements against defendants who have neglected, abandoned or mistreated their animals. We believe that enforcement of both civil and criminal laws will complement and enhance the welfare of animals in Harris County.